


Remember me? Please?

by jessthemess19



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: AFTER IW, Bucky and Peter were best mates in the soul stone, Hurt Peter Parker, I'll Love You Forever, May is an incredible parental figure, Pepper Potts is a mum basically, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Precious Peter Parker, Protective May Parker (Spider-Man), Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony stark is trying, and ever, basically i'll just add any when I get to it, idk how to tag, please just read it, spoilers for SM:HC but if you haven't seen it why are you reading this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-09-07 07:53:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16850110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessthemess19/pseuds/jessthemess19
Summary: “Peter! You’re awake!” May came rushing over, quickly lowering her voice when Peter flinched at the loud sound. “God I was so worried…” She pulled away from the hug she had engulfed her nephew in, tears glistening in her eyes as she looked down at his weak and frail body.Updates every Monday (Hopefully)





	1. You're awake!

**Author's Note:**

> Heyoooooooo It's been a while since I wrote any fanfiction and I've really missed it so here is another one! If it turns out to be popular than it's probably going to be a long one, so I hope you all enjoy! If you have any ideas of where you think the story should go then PLEASE don't be afraid to leave a little comment saying your idea - I suffer from writer's block very often so prompts are always helpful. Of course if I use your prompt I'll shout you out and dedicate the chapter to you (Idk how to do that but if I find out how I will!) Anywayyyy, enough of my rambling...

The light was unbearable, flooding Peter’s senses as he slowly blinked open his eyes. His senses entered overload as his nose was filled with the strong overpowering scent of antibacterial, his ears overwhelmed with the consistent beeping. “What…where am I?” He said, unsure if the words even left his mouth. 

“Peter! You’re awake!” May came rushing over, quickly lowering her voice when Peter flinched at the loud sound. “God I was so worried…” She pulled away from the hug she had engulfed her nephew in, tears glistening in her eyes as she looked down at his weak and frail body. 

“May, don’t be upset! I’m sorry…” Peter mumbled, weakly reaching towards her face to wipe the stray tear which had made its way down her face. She caught his hand and gently pressed his against his cheek, both letting out a small sigh, clearly comforted by each other. 

“Don’t you dare say sorry Peter, you did nothing wrong.” 

“What happened?” Peter asked softly, gazing around the large hospital room filled with medical equipment, locating the source of the beeping. A large grey machine with flickering lights stood at the side of his bed, holding a bag of fluid which Peter tracked down to a tube which disappeared under his skin. 

“Petey, you had a big fall, and you hit your head pretty bad.” May’s face fell as she recounted the events which led to their current situation. “You didn’t shoot a web in time, Mr. Stark had to come and rescue you but you had lost a lot of blood…” She trailed off at Peter’s confused expression. “Are you okay Pete? Do you need me to go and get someone for you?” 

“No I’m fine, are you okay though? You sound crazy!” Peter joked, wincing a little as the movement jostled his position in the comfy bed.

“Pete? What do you mean ‘I sound crazy’” May slowed her words, trying to understand what her nephew had said. 

“Well, for starters, what do you mean ‘I didn’t shoot a web in time?’ I don’t know what a web is, let alone know how to shoot one to save myself falling!” Peter joked once again, but noticing the serious expression May still wore on her face he decided to be more serious. “And what do you mean Mr. Stark came and saved me? You don’t mean THE Mr. Stark do you? Are you sure YOU didn’t hit your head Aunt May? Where is Uncle Ben? Why isn’t he here?” 

May just stared back at her nephew with pure horror etched on her face, before rushing out of the spacious hospital room. Peter heard, though he wasn’t sure how he did, a hushed conversation between May and a voice which sounded vaguely familiar from outside the door, but soon enough he heard both footsteps receding. Drifting back to sleep, Peter swore he saw a glimpse of short brown hair and brown pooling eyes standing over his bed, but he convinced himself his mind was play tricks on him. 

Hours later, he awoke again, greeted once more by the sight of May hovering over his bed, eyes filled with concern and recent tear tracks apparent down her cheeks. “Hey May.” Peter whispered, realising how dry his throat was. Each swallow and word felt like he was rubbing his throat with sandpaper. Gesturing towards the glass of water, he spotted himself in the reflection of one of the machines, startled by his appearance. “May… I look so old…” He said, again in a whisper. 

“Peter, um…God how do you tell someone this? Look Peter, the doctor said that, that in the fall you may have suffered from some memory loss…do you understand that?” May looked over at her nephew with the familiar concern that Peter had become so accustomed to. “How much do you remember?” 

“I haven’t lost my memory! I’m fine. My name is Peter Benjamin Parker, I’m 13 years old and I love science. See? I’m fine! You never answered my question – is Ben at work? Is that why he isn’t here?” Peter smiled widely, looking around for the man he didn’t know would never come back. 

May began to cry again, looking back at a figure at the door who was hidden from Peter. “Pete, you’re 15.” 

“No I’m not May. I’m 13. This isn’t funny where is Ben?” 

“Petey, Pete you need to listen to me now. You’re in the hospital wing of the Stark compound. You’ve hit your head and you’re suffering from amnesia. You are 15 years old, and Uncle Ben… uncle Ben isn’t coming.” May faltered towards the end of the sentence, not even bothering to wipe the never ending flow of tears that where freefalling down her cheeks. 

“Why? Why isn’t he coming?” Peter asked innocently, masking his fear. What was happening? Why wasn’t May telling him the truth? 

“Peter, can you remember anything from the last 2 years? Uncle Ben…Uncle Ben passed away a year ago Peter.” Peter’s face stayed the same, the expression of confusion not budging from his pure features. “Pete? Do you understand?” Peter’s face crumpled as he began to sob, his tears mixing with May’s as she pulled him in close for another hug. “Hey, hey it’s okay. We can fix this Peter, we can fix this.” 

~~~~

“Look May I know you said I shouldn’t go in there but I’m going to no matter what.” Tony said as he pushed May out of the doorframe and stepped into the spacious hospital room. “Hey Kiddo! Sorry if I startled you!” Peter just stared at him, eyes wide and filled with awe as the billionaire sat down next to his hospital bed.

“You’re… you’re Mr. Stark. THE Mr. Stark!” Peter said, mouth hanging open in a small O. 

“See May, I knew he would know who I was!” Tony said, turning towards the doorframe which housed the boy’s aunt, a smug smirk clearly apparent on his face. 

“Of course I know who you are!” Peter said, shocked. “Oh my God you’re awesome! I can’t believe I get to meet you… this is a dream this can’t be real! Oh…” The boy’s face fell, and he trailed off his sentence, casting his eyes downwards. 

“Hey Kid you okay?” Tony asked, brown eyes filled with concern. 

“Yeah um… I mean.” Peter replied, looking towards May. “Does this mean I’m dying?” He asked, the innocence within the question making Tony’s heart break. 

May came rushing back into the room, clutching onto Peter’s hand once more. “No! No…why would you ask that Petey?” 

“Well, um, why else would Mr. Stark be here? It must be some sort of Make a Wish foundation thing. They only do this sort of thing if you’re dying, so…” 

“Wait, you don’t remember me kid?” Tony asked, his face grave and eyes starting to fill with tears he was desperately trying to blink away. 

“I remember you – you’re Mr. Stark… May I’m confused what’s happening?” Peter’s eyes were also starting to fill with tears as he looked up at his former mentor with such confusion and innocence in his features that Tony could no longer deny the tears which had slowly made their way down his cheeks. 

“It’s okay Pete, it’s alright. Mr. Stark is going now anyway.” She said, shooting Tony a pointed stare. Once out of the room, she grabbed the billionaire’s arm, pulling him back towards her. “Look, I know this is hard, it’s going to be hard for everyone, but… but I think it’s best if you leave… leave Peter alone for now.” 

“You can’t be serious.” Tony said, sadness lifting off his face to reveal nothing but anger. 

“It’s for the best Tony! Everything is so confusing to him right now. He doesn’t even know he is Spiderman – Hell he only just found out that Ben died. Have you ever had to witness someone grieving a lost one twice? Because God damn it I’ve had to watch it three times. Once for his parents and now twice for Ben. I won’t, and I repeat, won’t, let him get hurt again.” 

“May please… he’s like my kid…” Tony trailed off, searching for compassion in May’s eyes. 

“I’m sorry. He just needs time. Goodbye Tony.” She said, shutting the door behind her after slipping back into the hospital room, once again gravitating towards Peter’s bed. 

“He doesn’t remember me, he doesn’t remember me, he doesn’t remember me…” Tony repeated as he sunk to the floor, placing his head in this hands and sobbing loudly against the marble tiles.


	2. How could I forget? How could I do that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song I listened to whilst writing this - "Second Chances" By Imagine Dragons. It doesn't really relate but if you wanted to know what sort of thing I was feeling when I wrote this I'll put the songs I had on repeat on here for you to enjoy if you want to.   
> Also, I know I said updates every Monday, but I just wanted the first 2 chapters out there to help drum up more hits - even though all the comments and kudos have really pushed me to get this chapter out there!

Tony stood in the upper floors of his penthouse, staring down at the small, ant like figures on the street below, going about their life like his hadn’t just come tumbling down. Pepper stood behind him, arms wrapped around his waist and tears also flowing down her porcelain skin. 

“I have to watch him leave, again.” Tony mumbled. 

“Tony, this can be fixed…this has to be fixed.” Pepper said with such determination that even Tony felt there might be a slimmer of hope. “Tones, I know you want to help him, you need to help him, but I really think that you should leave it for a bit.” Tony turned in her arms till his eyes met hers, confusion seeping into all of his features. “I just think you should consider what May said.” Pepper stated, the softness and gentility apparent in her voice. 

“No.” Tony said firmly. “No I won’t take it away. Pep it nearly killed me the first time I did it. Then look what happened! He got trapped under a building – and where was I? I give him an upgraded one, and he dies in space. In SPACE. I give him another upgraded one, and he goes and gets Amnesia! God Pep, nothing I do will ever be able to protect him – the suit is at least a layer of projection. It’s something to remind him of me.” 

“But Tones, he can’t be reminded of you. The confusion it would cause, god it would be unbearable. And all those incidents happened whilst he was out being Spiderman. He won’t be doing that anymore.” Pepper unhooked Tony’s arms from his waist and walked towards the red plush couch, wiping her eyes. “You don’t know how much this hurts me, but I think…I think we need to let him go Tony.” 

“How could you even think that! When he was gone he was the only thing which got me up in the morning, which pushed me towards a way to fix the mess that Thanos left, and when he came back, God when he came back that smile made a feel like everything had been worth it. All those sleepless nights, all that bad press. Everything was for him. Now that he is gone what have I got left? What’s left for me here?” Tony practically yelled. 

“So you’ve got nothing and no one then huh? Are you sure it’s Peter who has Amnesia because I think you’re the forgetful one. Here I am, just as broken-hearted at this as you, but supporting you because I love you. You really have no one? Here I am Tony. Or am I not enough for you now?” Pepper yelled back, the fire in her eyes quenching itself as she stared back at Tony, who had once again headed towards the bar, grabbing the strongest Whisky he could find and pouring himself a glass, and then another, and another, until she lost count in the 5 minutes she had been observing her husband. “Tony, you said you would stop drinking…you promised Peter you would stop.” She spoke softly, stroking his arm in an attempt to comfort him. 

“Well that doesn’t fucking matter anymore does it! If he can’t remember it, then the promise never even happened. And God forbid I bring it up in front of him or even show my face near him because he might get confused! Am I just supposed to forget the last 2 years? Just forget all the hours spent with him in the lab, forget the way his eyes light up and his tongue sticks out when he is working on a project? Forget the joy he brought to me?” Tony pushed Pepper’s hand off his arm, and sulked towards the couch again. “Am I just supposed to walk out of his life forever and act like he doesn’t exist? Extract him from my memory like he has extracted me from his? You know I can’t do that Pepper. You KNOW I can’t.” Tony sighed and ran his hand through his hair, not caring that it spread the grease from fixing engines all night that had built up on his fingertips through his clean brown hair. 

“No. You don’t have to walk out forever. I think I know a way I can help you Tony.” She said, her eyes gleaming with hope once again, as she joined her husband on the couch. “I have a plan honey.” 

~~~

“Hey Pete! Can I come in? I have some visitors for you!” May said as she popped her head round the door frame into the hospital room Peter had become so accustomed to.   
“Yeah, yeah come in.” Peter replied, pushing himself up on this elbows, surprising himself at his strength. He was already in a bad mood, everything was becoming too much: Too loud, too bright, too textured, too tasteful. Peter couldn’t work out why though. Ned and MJ walked through the door, instantly running to his side, showering him with hugs. 

“Oh my God Peter! I was so worried – you can’t just leave your guy in the chair like that! I thought you were dead…” Ned said, starting to get the Lego set out of his bag to give to Peter. 

“What? What do you mean guy in the-“ He was instantly cut off by MJ kissing him long and hard on the lips. 

“God loser don’t ever do that to me again.” She said as she pulled back, tears glistening on her usually emotionless face. “When May called, I thought it was like last time…” She trailed off as she saw the confusion plastered over her former boyfriend’s face. 

“MJ? Why did you just kiss me?” Peter said, face turning an even deeper shade of red, even though that was practically impossible. “MJ we haven’t spoken properly since like 3rd grade.” 

“Fuck, I forgot he forgot. I just thought… come on Peter, you have to remember, we went through so much together. Pete we were stuck in that world together, you remember, you have to remember. God Peter if you don’t remember then I was basically stuck there by myself, and honestly, I can’t think about that.” MJ said, tears still flowing down her face, mirroring Peter’s own damp cheeks. 

“MJ, I don’t know what you’re talking about…” Peter said slowly, beginning to inch away from her and Ned. 

Ned stopped unpacking the Lego set and turned his attention back towards Peter. “You seriously don’t remember?” Peter shook his head, turning away so that his best friend wouldn’t need to see his tears. “MJ, MJ we should talk.” 

MJ and Ned walked away from the bed, until they thought they were out of his hearing range, but again for a reason Peter couldn’t quite place he could still hear them.   
“We can’t tell him.” Ned said definitely. 

“We have to! He has a right to know what happened to him. And what happened to me. He has a right to know about Thanos and Mr. Stark, and…” MJ trailed off, sobs racking her body. Her boyfriend was gone. The boy in the bed wasn’t Peter, he was just using his body, his few remaining memories. This had to be a nightmare…. But it was all too real to be a nightmare. 

“Look at yourself MJ. Even thinking back to that place is painful enough. If we told him, he would have to re-live it… We both know we can’t do that to him.” Ned reasoned, bringing the sobbing MJ closer to his body for a hug. “He needs to remember on his own. If he can.” 

Ned and MJ stayed for another hour, eventually leaving as they soon found they had little to talk about. May re-entered the room, with Mr. Stark trailing behind but out of sight.   
“Hey Petey. Did you enjoy having your friends over?” May asked, stopping herself when she noticed the tears stained face of her nephew. “What’s wrong Peter? Are you in pain? Where does it hurt? Point where it hurts” May instructed when she got no reply. Silently, Peter lifted his right hand, and pointed to his head, staring blanking through May. “What do you mean Peter? I’ll get the doctor.” May went towards the call button, but was stopped by Peter. 

“They aren’t my friends. They don’t know me. Besides, the most my friends can tell me is what our friendship was like and what experiences we shared together from their perspectives. They can't tell me how I felt about those things, the nuances of our friendships, the million little things that went through my head and never made it past my lips because they're impossible to express. The things the make up and influence my emotions toward people. And there are things they tell me about me, all the things I've done, while all good things, don't feel like me. And what if I've done some bad things that they're choosing not to tell me to spare my feelings? It feels like an impostor has been living my life for the past two years while I've been asleep, and now that I'm awake and he’s decided to up and leave without any notice, I have to retrace his steps and figure out what he's been up to for the last couple of years and, maybe, try to continue in his footsteps.” Peter explained, still staring blanking at the wall, a wall he didn't know he could crawl up. 

Both May and Mr. Stark began to weep. They wept for the loss of Peter and the person he now was. Wept for the loss of Spiderman and the hero Peter had become. Must most importantly, they wept for themselves, selfish as it seems, for the person who had been wrenched out of their lives, all because of a stupid bump on the head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peter's speech about forgetting things is something I found from a real amnesia patient on Quora. I won't take credit for it because it's their words I just re-arranged them. Personally I don't suffer from amnesia so I wanted to get a realistic point of view for this chapter. Hope you enjoyed and as always - please comment and leave Kudos if you are liking the story - they help me write quicker!


	3. What about what we went through?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...I'm not happy with this. I'll leave it to you guys to judge it but as always - comments and love make me work faster.

Tony once again sat alone in the Avengers compound, his back resting on the door of what used to be Peter’s bedroom. “Might as well use it for storage now huh.” He said aloud, to no one in particular. 

“Stark!” A panicked voice said from the end of the corridor. Tony looked up, hiding the hoodie which had once been Peter’s favourite which he had been clinging onto for the past hour, his eyes resting on the brunette stood several metres away from him. “Tony I only just got the message. What do you mean Peter is in hospital? Is he okay? What happened?” Bucky looked down at the hoodie, and then back up at Tony’s tear stained and drained face. “Oh God, he’s not…he’s not d-dead is he?” Bucky asked, fearing the answer. 

“He might as well be.” Was the only thing Tony said to calm his fears. 

“WHAT! What do you mean Tony! Is he okay?” Bucky said, running his hand down his face. 

“He’s fine Buck. He…he fell and hit his head, and even with his healing he still lost a large chunk of memory. Specifically the memories involving me and you. We don’t exist to him anymore. So – like I said – he might as well be dead.” Tony said, face almost emotionless – he was an empty shell at this point. 

“No. That’s not true Tony.” Bucky denied. 

“It is Bucky.” 

“Tony – you’re not funny. Now where is he?” 

“Buck…I don’t joke about this sort of stuff when it comes to Peter. I know you guys went through the horrors of the soul stone together, and I know you kept each other going, but he doesn’t even remember being in that hell, let alone you or me.” Tony said, wincing at the mention of the soul stone. 

“If I go see him, he would remember. He has to remember. We went through so much…God if he doesn’t remember then what’s the point in anything!” Bucky practically yelled. “I can’t live without him – I hate to admit it but that little shit makes life without Steve fucking worth living – a kid who can take on the whole world? That’s basically Steve.2. If Peter’s gone, I… I l-lose Steve.” Bucky said, taking out his anger on a nearby wall, creating a gaping hole in the plaster. 

“Buck, I know. I know okay. But honestly – we shouldn’t be interfering. The Doctor said it could make everything worse.” 

“I won’t lose him Tony…” Bucky trailed off. “God it’s like Steve going all over again. Only this time it’s worse. Steve couldn’t come back to me, to us, but Pete? He’s just downstairs. He’s downstairs, and here, but he’s not here.” Bucky mused, trying to wipe the tears away from his face as Tony pulled him into a hug. 

“No. I won’t just let him go.” Bucky said, voice filled with determination as he pushed Tony away from him. “he will remember me.”

~~~~

“Hello Peter!” Bucky said as he entered his hospital room, ignoring the glare he was receiving from May. If looks could kill, Bucky would need to be resurrected several times to do the look justice. 

“May? May why is he in my room?” Peter said, eyes turning wide. 

“Peter? It’s okay! I know we fought against each other but-“ Bucky was cut off by Peter scrambling out of his bed and edging slowly closer to May and the door. “Peter? What’s wrong?” Bucky asked. Disappointed was an understatement – he was devastated Peter didn’t remember him. Part of him wanted to believe that this was all an elaborate prank, but deep down he knew. His Peter was gone forever. The last thing to remind him of Steve was gone. Everything good in his life had gone – why did they have to go and he have to stay? 

“Have you come to kill me? You’re the Winter Soldier!” Peter asked with such innocence and fear that it almost made Bucky whimper with the rising feeling of guilt. Not only did Peter forget him, the only thing in that scrambled head was that Bucky was a murderer. Everything that happened between them was gone. He was no longer Bucky – he was the Winter Soldier again. 

“Peter, no he isn’t” May said in an attempt to console her startled nephew. “He’s from counselling, aren’t you Dr… um…Dr Popadopolis?” May said, not so subtly chucking hints in Bucky’s direction. 

Bucky gave her an exasperated glare at his new alias, but quickly dropped the malicious look when he realised that the lie was working, and Peter had returned to his bed, albeit still slightly wary. “Sorry” Peter said, looking down at his sock clad feet. “You look really like this bad guy I read about in the newspaper…” Peter trailed off as Bucky sat down.  
“It’s okay…it happens all the time.” Bucky said, smiling but hiding the hurt in his eyes. “So Peter, what can you actually remember?” He asked, testing the waters. ‘Please say me’ Bucky thought in his head, but he knew he shouldn’t get his hopes up. 

“Um, well… WOAH you have a metal arm? That is awesome dude!” Peter said, shocking Bucky as he repeated what he had said to him all those years ago. Peter’s eyes filled with wonder as they wondered up and down his bionic arm. 

“Hey you can touch it if you want Spiderling…” Bucky said, soon trailing off as he realised his mistake. Peter again looked up at him in confusion, several emotions crossing his face. “What is it kid?” 

“Nothing, I don’t know… it’s just… well… this is going to sound strange because that was a strange thing to call me, but, I don’t know, I just feel like someone called me it before. I feel like I can almost see the memory, but it’s fuzzy…” Peter trailed off, once again looking down and fiddling with his fingers. 

“Don’t worry about it Peter. This is good – really good.” Bucky said, a smile dancing slightly on his lips. “Do you remember who called you that?” Bucky asked, hoping he could push his luck. 

“Not really. But I can sort of remember why they said it… I think I was sad… I can’t remember where I was. No – wait I can – I didn’t know where I was. Someone helped me, and they called me that. I’m sorry… I can’t remember anything else.” 

“Don’t apologise or feel bad Peter. What you’ve said is more than enough.” Bucky said, trying to hide the tears of joy from the young boy in front of him. He was trying to remember Bucky – and he was close to remembering. 

~~~~

Tony sat in the dark hospital room, the silence only being broken by the soft sighs and breaths expelled by the small body in the bed to the right of him. Tony looked over Peter’s peaceful sleeping face, brushing a few stray curls from his face. What he wouldn’t give to see those big bambi eyes filled with joy again, excited to see him again. As Tony began to sit back in his armchair, settling in for the night, the small boy began to stir. 

“Mr. Stark?” He mumbled, eyes still shut. 

“Kid?” Tony said, hope filling his heart. Maybe the kid knew he was there after all…

“Mr. Stark… I don’t feel so good…” Peter mumbled again, this time his body grew more restless, his face crumpling in pain and confusion, breath hitching and fists clenching.  
Tony knew the signs of a nightmare all too well, but this time, maybe it wasn’t a nightmare. Maybe it was the forgotten past coming to haunt his dreams. Tony’s reasoning was cut off by Peter sitting straight up in his bed, eyes finally open and wet with tears.

“Kid, kid you’re alright. You’re okay I’ve got you.” Tony said, as Peter almost subconsciously fell back into Tony’s arms, pressing his face against Tony’s chest.  
“Of all the things Pete – why did you have to remember that?” Tony wondered aloud, still hugging the sobbing figure of Peter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you still liked it even though I felt this chapter sucked - I wanted to show the relationship between Bucky and Peter which they made in the soul stone but I felt I didn't show that very well. Anyway I hope you are enjoying the story, I promise I'll do better next time!


	4. I thought I was on the floor...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay - I hate myself and this chapter. So much is wrong with it but I just didn't want to keep you waiting. I know it's short but school has been mental lately and I'll try and update before Christmas but I'm not sure... Anyway, I hope you like it, even though I don't. 
> 
> Warning - Mild swearing and flashbacks  
> Song I listened to - "Goodbye John Smith" - Barnes Courtney

Peter left the hospital 2 days after the nightmare incident, still confused and memories slowly trickling back into his memory. Tony trailed not far behind, carrying his bags and helping him load them into the car Tony had arranged to pick them up. 

“Honestly Mr Stark you don't need to do this!’ Peter said after picking up one of his suitcases, surprising himself at how easily he could lift it after watching Tony struggle for so long. 

‘Don't mention it Mr Parker.’ Tony cringed at the formality between them after he had held the boy as he crumbled away beneath him. ‘Like I said, you were hurt on Stark property, so I need to make sure you make a full recovery. Also, a smart kid like you – might give this old man a run for his money.’ Tony chuckled, ruffling Peter brown curls. 

 

_A hand on his head, stroking his curls as he wept in a world he didn’t know. Where was he?_

 

Peter fell to the group, gasping for air and eyes wide. ‘Pete? Pete talk to me what's happening' Tony said, his calm tone wavering as he began to panic. 

 

_The scene changed. He was trapped, rubble pushing on his back stopping him breathing. A voice sounded in his head – ‘If you're nothing without this suit then you shouldn't have it.’ Why did the voice sound familiar? It was getting harder to breath, the rubble pushing further and further onto his back. He couldn't move._

‘Pete? Peter you're okay, come back. Remember what the doctor said – focus on what you can feel. Can you feel my hands on your back?’ Tony asked, relieved as the small boy gave a little nod, his eyes still wide and his hands shaking. ‘Peter it's just a flashback okay? Its just your memories trying to come back.’ After what felt like hours Peter began to come back, his eyes becoming less panicked, his small body falling back into Tony again. ‘Okay, okay you’re back. Can you do something for me Pete? Can you focus on my face. Tell me what you see.” Tony said, desperation flooding out of his body as he said into the wide eyes of the boy in front of him, wanting so badly to just reach out and stroke his hair and wipe his tears away. 

 

Peter began to recite Tony's features back to him, as Tony internally thanked May for making him remember Peter's coping techniques.  
‘What did you see Peter?’ Tony asked once Peter was settled in the back of the car. 

‘I don't know,’ Peter started, staring out of the window to avoid eye contact. ‘I didn't know where I was, but I was with someone. They were stroking my hair, and I was crying. I don't know who they were or why I was crying.’ Peter admitted as Tony started at him, concern filling his eyes. 

‘Was that all?’ 

‘No' Peter said truthfully. ‘Everything changed and suddenly I was stuck or something. I don't know why I was stuck but I couldn't breathe and the rubble was really heavy and I couldn't move...’ Peter trailed off. ‘Sorry, Mr Stark. I know you probably don't want to hear about this from some broken boy you feel you have some obligation to check on.’ Peter said, starting to get angry. 

‘Hey - That's not true Pete.’ Tony protested as the car began to pull away from the hospital bay of the Stark Tower. 

‘No offense or anything, but why are you here?’ Peter asked, starting straight back at Tony . 

‘Pete, I'm here because I care. Because i see myself in you. Because you have gone through something horrible, and I know what that feels like.’ And because youre my Spiderboy – Tony knew he couldn't say it, though it was all he wanted to do. It wasn't fair – why couldn't it have been him? Why did it have to be his boy? 

~~~~~ 

‘Hey Mr Stark! I wanted to show you something!’ The boy's voice resonated from the hologram in front of Bucky's face, flickering and changing as he browsed through the many files containing videos of Peter at the compound, finally resting on one clip which Bucky had forgotten. His brown strands of hair fell in front of his face as the clip began to play. 

_‘Mr White Wolf sir?’ Peter asked, stepping in front of Bucky._

_‘Spiderling how many times – call me Bucky.’_

_‘Oh yeah, Mr Bucky Sir. Anyway... I got another one!’ Peter said, holding up a little magnet which has a photo of them on it, smiling and on a rollercoaster, something Bucky never would have done without Peter._

_‘Aw cool buddy stick it on’ Bucky said, pointing to his metal arm as Peter moved a few magnets around to make space for the new addition._

The projection ended, and Bucky again was alone in the quiet room, tears once more running down his face, clouding his blue eyes. 

“Buck, you’ve gotta stop doing this.” Sam Wilson said, leaning against the doorframe. 

“What do you mean?” Bucky asked, wiping his face. 

“You’ve been in here for an hour Buck. You have to stop.” 

~~~~~

“Hey Pete I’ve got the rest of your stuff, do you want to say goodbye to Mr. Stark? Peter…!” May trailed off in shock as she looked up at her nephew. “Pete… What the fuck…” 

Peter fell in front of her, looking around in amazement as he looked up at the spot he had previously occupied. “I thought…I thought I was on the floor.” He said, still in shock. “How the fuck did I get up there?” he asked, pointing to the ceiling. 

May had a lot of explaining to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me I already hate myself enough for this chapter - please leave a comment about what you liked and what I could improve on, all comments make me work faster!


	5. I've been there...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So first things first, I HATE THIS CHAPTER - I know I keep saying it but I keep hating it. Anyway, MERRY CHRISTMASSSSSSSSSS!

“May? May please explain why I was on the ceiling!” Peter said, his voice growing more frantic by the second. “May I’m confused – what’s happening to me?” He asked, somehow adding more fear into his voice although it seemed impossible. 

May stood there, lasagne dish still in hand as her heart was split two ways. Does she lie and save Peter the pain and confusion which he was currently experiencing, only to then find out about it later when his superpowers made a reappearance? Or, does she tell him the straight truth, and tell him all about his alter-ego, and tell him he is someone he doesn’t remember? May stayed still for at least five minutes, mulling over her options in her head, all while Peter grow more frantic and his breathing grew more erratic, his head hung between his legs as he crouched on the floor, senses overwhelmed by the mass of new information he was attempting to process. “Okay Pete,” May said, finally breaking the silence which had only been disturbed by the sound of Peter’s broken sobs. “Peter you need to calm down okay? Peter I’m going to explain everything okay but I need you to calm down…” May placed her arms around her nephew, guiding him to stand up and sit on his bed. After ten minutes had passed Peter had finally regained his breathing pattern, and had his heart rate down to a normal level. He looked up at May, waiting for her to explain. 

“May, please… I’m so confused…” Peter whispered, almost scared of his own voice. 

“This is going to be hard to understand, but I hope I can help it make sense okay? I think you will be able to remember which a little prompt – I think there’s a reason you keep remembering things…” May said, hinting towards his healing power, but still not ready to say it out loud. “I want to show you something Peter.” May said as she pulled out her Stark Industries phone, loading up a video of Spiderman on Youtube. 

The red and blue figure swung across the footage, stopping a car head on, and then immediately swinging away again. Peter’s eyes widened and then shut in concentration. Something was becoming clearer in his mind, but it was still too far away, just inches from his grip but still too blurry to make out. “May why are you showing me this?” Peter asked in a timid voice as his eyes opened once again. 

“Okay Pete this is going to be a massive shock, but it’s going to be okay. That person-“ May pointed at the screen, “-Is you Peter. You’re the Spiderman.” May said, sitting back to give Peter space to think over the revelation. 

“But, but, but how? I don’t understand May…” 

“About a month after Uncle Ben died,” May started, noticing how Peter’s eyes grew sadder at the mention of his uncle, and she remembered that he only learnt of that a few days ago. “You were bitten by a radioactive spider.” May continued, stopping when she noticed that Peter’s eyes were stamped shut and his lips in a thin line of concentration.

“I-I remember…” Peter said, eyes still scrunched and his forehead wrinkling as he tried to retrieve the memory which had been out of his reach. “I remember the heat, then the cold, and the pain… It was like fire in my veins. And then it just stopped, and I felt different. I don’t know what happened but I remember it…” Peter’s eyes opened again, a small flicker of hope within them. “May – I remembered it!” He said as a smile slowly danced on his lips. 

May mirrored his look of hope and pride, revelling in the fact that he remembered, which meant that his healing factor was working. If it was working, then maybe he could return to his former self in time. “That’s good Pete! What else do you remember?”

“I’m not sure…I remember swinging, like in the video… but that’s sort of it.” 

May looked down at Peter’s hands which were being held by her own, sighing and wiping one single tear from her cheek. “That’s okay Peter, we’ve got time.” She said reassuringly.   
“I just – I just don’t understand. You’re telling me I’m this person, but in my head I’m not. That’s not me, or at least the me which I know now…” Peter trailed off until a smile slowly grew on his face and he began to giggle. “As if I’m having an identity crisis at 15.” 

May laughed along with him, relishing in the sound of his joy even when he was so hurt and broken. After leaving Peter napping on the lower bunk bed in his room, May pulled out her phone, dialling one of the many numbers she now had on speed dial after the accident. “Hey, are you free?” She asked, gaining a muffled reply from the other end of the line. “Great. Do you think you could come round? I need someone with experience.”

~~~~~~

Bucky Barnes strolled through downtown Queens, stopping at the run-down apartment building which housed the young superhero. Rolling his shoulders back and clenching his jaw, he pressed the buzzer for their apartment. 

“Hello?” The unmistakable voice of Peter sounded through the fuzzy and broken speaker. 

“Um, Hi. It’s Buck-Um your doctor, the P one. May called me.” Bucky said, remembering the false name and alias which May had given him as to not confuse Peter.   
“Oh yeah, come right up.” Peter said, his voice cutting off and being followed by the sound of a buzzer, indicating that the apartment was now open for him to come up. Entering the small apartment Bucky looked around, eyes finally resting on the small figure of the boy curled up, wrapped in a blanket and watching a science documentary on TV.   
“You still of school then Spiderli-Uh Peter?” Bucky asked, plonking himself down on the sofa next to Peter, reaching out to grab some of the blanket for himself but then stopping himself when he remembered that Peter wouldn’t remember. 

“Yeah, I’ve got a week off. Obviously my injury didn’t affect my semantic memories so I’ve still got to go to school. I guess that’s good… Mr. Stark says that’s good. He wants to check my schoolwork and stuff, I don’t really know why.” Peter said, his eyes never leaving the documentary. 

“Okay Peter, let’s talk.” Bucky said, taking the remote from Peter’s hands and switching off the TV, leaving just him and Peter in silence. “How are you feeling?” Bucky asked, waiting for a response but getting none, Peter’s head still turned towards the TV. “Were you feeling happy? Sad? Angry?” Peter tensed at the last word, indicating that Bucky should continue along that path. 

“Yeah, a little bit angry.” Peter stated, still staring off into the distance. 

“Why?” Bucky asked softly, not wanting to push too far. 

“I don’t know. It’s like, everyone is tell me who I am, but I don’t know that’s me. That’s not the me I know, and that’s scary I guess.” 

“Peter, can you just listen to me for a minute.” Bucky said, finally drawing Peter’s attention towards him. “This is going to sound strange but I understand. I know what you’re going through. It’s like everyone else knows who you are, but you don’t. You just can’t understand why you can’t remember. It’s frustrating and that’s why you’re angry, but you’re still so confused.” Bucky thought back to the pain of having his mind wiped repeatedly, and the pain of constantly trying to remembering who he was and what he did. He didn’t realise, but a tear began to roll down his cheek, sniffing and looking away from Peter, who was now looking back at Bucky with concern filled eyes. 

“You wanna talk about it?” Peter asked, laying his head gently against Bucky’s chest as Bucky’s eyes widened in surprise. 

“What you doing Peter?” Bucky said, holding his breath as Peter took his usual position, cuddled up next to him as if nothing had happened, as if he hadn’t forgotten anything.   
“I dunno, just feels right I guess. Feels like I’ve done it before, and if it feels like that, it means I probably have.” Peter said truthfully, his head not lifting from Bucky. “I don’t exactly know who you are, but I know you aren’t a doctor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you still like this chapter, and that you have an amazing Christmas/holiday/whatever you celebrate!


	6. Nightmares or Memories?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I half like this one, but it's not perfect. I've not got a lot of writing done recently because I'm really ill but hopefully once I'm better I'll be writing a lot more and hopefully a lot better content!

Bucky and Peter stayed like that for another hour, Peter still pressed into Bucky’s side, clinging onto his t-shirt as if it was the only thing grounding him to reality right now. Bucky looked down at the mess of curls beneath his chin, waiting for the uncontrollable sobs being emitted from the boy had slowed. “You want to rant Peter? Get it all off your chest?” 

“Not really no.” Peter said truthfully. 

“What do you want to do then Peter. I can go if you want…” Bucky asked, waiting for the boy to move from his chest. 

“I don’t know…I just don’t really want to be alone. May is working until 9 today, so…” 

“You wanna watch a movie or something? Star wars?” Bucky smiled as the boy lit up, excited to watch his favourite film. “I’ll take that as a yes then.” Bucky chuckled. After setting up the film, and of course grabbing an appropriate amount of snacks, Bucky settled back down next to Peter, pulling the blanket over both of them. After about 40 minutes, Peter began to drift off to sleep, warmed and comforted by the presence of the man, who he could also remember, sat next to him. Bucky turned and placed his chin atop of Peter’s head – “This feels just like it used to.” He murmured into the soft brown curls. 

“Bucky?” Peter asked sleepily, eyes drowsy and close to sleep. “I’m the spider-man.” He confessed, before drifting back to the comfortable land of sleep. 

Bucky smiled sadly, chuckling slightly as he settled down even further into the sofa. “Yeah Spiderling. Yeah you are.” He almost whispered, before sitting upright once again, the realisation of what Peter had said dawning on him, bring a large and hard to supress grin to his face. “He said my name…” Bucky said, excitement and hope bubbling in his voice as he looked down at the small boy who was still lying across him. He leaned in close and rested his cheek against the top of Peter’s head, whispering once again “You said my name…” almost as if he didn’t believe it. 

~~~~~

_“Hey Peter!” MJ said, as she pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. “What you up to then losers?” she pointed at Ned and Peter, who were, of course, assembling a new lego death star._

_“Oi, careful who you call loser or you might not have a boyfriend anymore.” Peter said, grabbing her hand. Sirens sounded in the distance, slowly growing closer, and Peter looked longingly over his shoulder, hands itching towards his suit._

_“Go on then” MJ laughed, pointing towards the backpack which housed the famous red and blue suit._

_“Are you sure? It’s date night though?” Peter protested, hoping she would still let him go._

_“Go!” Ned and MJ both shouted, as Peter sprung into action, swinging off to the sound of the police cars._

_Suddenly the scene changed, the light and happiness of the previous dream making way for a newer, darker one. Peter was alone, but not alone, surrounded by the screams of half the universe. He was so confused, he couldn’t find anyone, only feel their pain. Everything near him was bathed in an orange tint, even his body. But it wasn’t his body, it was almost like his body wasn’t even there. He just seemed to be float, unaware of the passing of time, if time even existed, if he even existed. He was just there. He wasn’t alive, he wasn’t dead, just there._

_“Mr Stark? I don’t feel so good…” His last words rung in his head, the feeling of being slowly ripped apart still lingering in every joint, every cell in his body. He felt like he was suffocating, gasping for air but being met with nothing but dust. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder, but not on his shoulder. He felt the presence of a hand, somewhere in his disjointed sense of being._

_“Hey kid it’s okay!” A familiar voice sounded. Peter turned around, taking a minute to be able to open his eyes in his panic to take in the person next to him. “We’ve met before haven’t we? Berlin? We…um we fought against each other.” The man with long hair said, eyes searching Peters for some evidence of recognition._

_“You have a metal arm? That’s awesome dude…” Peter said in between sobs, remembering what he had said to the only man who seemed to exist in this place outside of himself when they had met before._

_Suddenly the scene changed again, and Peter was trapped under a large Aeroplane tunnel, his legs slowly giving way beneath the weight. Again the scene changed, and he was trapped under rubble, unable to move, or breathe, slowly fading away to death._

_“I’m down here! Please I can’t move! I’m down…” Peter shouted, looking up as a smartly dressed man began to saunter towards him. “I’m sorry! I just wanted to be like you!” Peter shouted as the man kept on walking past him, ignoring the small boy in pain._

_“And I wanted you to be better.”_

Peter woke with a start, clutching at the blanket covering him and breathing heavily, tears spilling over his eyelids and splashing onto the blanket. 

“Pete? Pete are you okay? It’s just a nightmare don’t worry!” Bucky said, running back from the kitchen to cradle the small boy in his arms, rocking him as he cried. 

“No it wasn’t! Bucky it wasn’t a nightmare! I keep having the same one. I-uh, I think… I think I’m remembering things, but they’re bad things! Things I don’t want to remember! Why can I only remember the bad things?” 

“Okay Pete just calm down.” Bucky said as he pushed a few damp curls off the boy’s forehead. “What happened?” 

Peter looked him dead in the eyes, still crying but trying to stay strong. “You have a metal arm? That’s awesome dude.” He said, waiting for the reaction from Bucky. 

Bucky stood up, eyes wide in shock as he backed away from the sofa which housed the sobbing boy. “I uh, I have to call Tony.” He said as he left the apartment and headed out into the hallway, only just catching the muttered reply from Peter. 

 

“Tell him I should have been better.” 

~~~~

May came back nearly as soon as Bucky had left, leaving work early to help her nephew. “Peter?” She called out as she walked in through the plain wooden door, eyeing Peter still curled up on the sofa. He lifted his head in acknowledgement, his attention focused once again on the Star Wars film playing on the TV. 

“I’m Spider-man, I have a girlfriend named MJ, and that man who just left was Bucky and he is important to me. Mr Stark is someone to me as well, but I don’t know who yet.”

“Okay Pete, that’s good…” May trailed off confused at the sudden explosion of information. 

“I just wanted to let you know that I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY NEW YEAR!


	7. You're in Big Trouble Now Kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this is not where I meant for this chapter to go but hey hooooooooo. I actually kind of like this chapter and I'm kind of proud of it... so I hope you enjoy! I also didn't mean for this to be as long as it is but I guess its just a little extra treat for you guys!
> 
> School starts again on Monday and it's going to be pretty busy so I'm not sure if I was 100% stick to the regular Mondays but I will try my hardest to get an update out every week.

“Pete I need to go work.” May said as she rushed around the apartment trying to gather her things. 

“Okay I’ll see you later.” Peter said, again not looking up from his spot on the sofa which he hadn’t left in almost two days. May looked at Peter, his hair greasy and messy, curls falling flat on his head and his eyes glazed over. He hadn’t moved from that spot since his nightmare with Bucky, and May had caught him crying on more than one occasion. She knew she needed to do something. 

“Okay that’s it Pete. I’m not gonna leave you here while I’m out.” May said in a determined tone, picking up a bag and stuffing a few of Peter’s clothes into it. 

“Where am I gonna go?” Peter asked, still glued to the sofa, huddling even further under it at the prospect of having to move from his safety spot. He knew what everything was here, there was nothing to confuse him and he liked that. 

“Just get in the car.” May said, practically pulling Peter out of his literal and figurative comfort zone and hauling him towards the door, ignoring his protests and excuses. The car ride was silent, with May focusing on the road and Peter staring blankly out of the window, until the little budget car pulled up outside a building which both inspired Peter, but also scared him. 

“May why are we at the Stark Tower?” Peter asked, his mind flicking back to the days spent in the hospital bay when he had woken up, confused and angry. “Why did you take me here?”

May ran a hand over her face, exasperation showing on her attractive features. “Pete, just get out I need to go to work.” 

“Wait why? I can’t stay here! You can’t just leave me on the street!” Peter said, making so much of a fuss that he failed to notice the older man in a black suit approaching the car. 

“Okay kid time to get out.” The man said, opening the car door and gesturing for Peter to come with him. 

“Wait… who are you?” Peter asked, confusion once again seeping into his features. This confusion, this feeling of everything being wrong, was the exact reason why Peter didn’t want to leave his spot on the sofa. Everything made sense there, and Peter would give the world to just be curled up again, surrounded by the blankets which provided him with so much comfort. 

“Just go with him please. Thanks for this Happy.” May said, as Peter finally got out of the car, his face showing how displeased he was at having to move. He watched as May sped off as fast as the cheap car could take her towards her work, before turning back towards the strange but familiar man in the black suit. 

“Look, I don’t know who you are, and I’m not going with you.” Peter said, not caring if he sounded childish. 

‘Mr. Parker please just come this way. Boss is waiting for you in the lab.’ The man said again, reaching towards Peter to steer him towards the huge building ahead. Happy grabbed the back of Peter’s grey and faded hoodie, only to be met with even more resistance and fear from the boy. 

‘NO I WON'T GO I DON'T KNOW YOU!’ Peter yelled, pushing away from the man in the black suit, surprising himself again at how easily he could push the much bigger man away.  
‘Hey hey Pete what's all this about!’ the famous Tony Stark said, sauntering out of his tower and surveying the scene in front of him. Peter had begun to cry, his distress apparent on his face. 

‘Mr Stark!’ Peter said as he fell towards the older man, trying to get as far away from the strange intimidating older man as possible. Peter tried to ignore how betrayed the strange man looked, realising a little too late that maybe he did know this man from his life which he had forgotten, like so many other things. 

‘Woah woah Pete hey! What's wrong?’ Tony asked, trying hard to remain standing which was becoming increasingly difficult due to Peter continually pushing him backwards. Jeez that kid was strong. 

‘He...he wanted me to go with him... I don’t know him!’ Peter said, his voice small and weak compared to usual cheer he held in his voice. 

Tony sighed, looking back at Happy. He could see why Peter would be scared. Hell Tony would be too if a random stranger with Happy's build showed up and told him to come with them. ‘Okay Pete. Shushhhh. Pete he works for me it's okay.’ Tony murmured into Peter's hair, not caring if half of New York was now staring at the billionaire and this strange, crying boy. ‘Let's get you inside.’ Tony said, as he finally noticed the mass of cameras and people surrounding them. He helped the small weak boy up onto his own feet again, and slowly started to move back towards the tower. Once inside the tall building, Peter visibly relaxed, but kept one eye on Happy. ‘Come on kid. I want to show you my lab.’

“Why?” Peter asked, looking up at Mr. Stark. 

“For once Pete just don’t ask questions okay? You’re gonna ruin the moment.” Tony said, leading the way through the massive tower down to the lab. As much as Tony didn’t want to admit it, he was almost glad Peter had lost his memory if it gave Tony the chance to see the wonder on the kid’s face for a second time as they entered the lab. Peter’s eyes lit up as he surveyed all the brainchildren of the great Tony Stark, his fingers tracing lightly over the various new projects as his mouth fell open into a silent O.  
“Woah, Mr. Stark! I can’t believe I’m down here! This is so cool! OH MY GOD is that the IRON MAN SUIT!” Peter exclaimed as he walked towards the red and gold suit which he had seen so many times on the poster which donned his wall. 

“No kid it’s a puppy.” Tony said, sarcasm dripping from his voice, but his tone didn’t reach his eyes, which were currently locked on the small boy who was still stood with his mouth open in shock. “I know you won’t remember this Pete, but you said the exact same thing the first time you came down here.” 

“I’ve been down here before?” Peter almost whispered, so awestruck he wasn’t even sure that the words left his mouth. Instead of answering, Tony just pointed at a table in the far corner of the room, which was covered in pieces of paper and unfinished products. Peter began to walk towards it, until he noticed the yellow blazer hanging off the chair in front of the desk which was all too familiar. “Was this mine?” Peter asked, again not sure if the words left his still open mouth as he gestured to the mess before him.  
“Yeah, yeah Pete it was yours. You used to come here all the time you know. You would do your homework while I worked and then we would work on stuff together.” Tony said, trying to sound nonchalant about the whole situation, but even he couldn’t convince himself that he wasn’t just trying to get the kid to remember. Remember anything from the relationship they had. Yeah Bucky had told him what Pete had remembered in his dream, but he wanted Peter to remember so much more than that one time. Didn’t he mean more to him than to just be forgotten like everyone else? 

“I worked on stuff with you?” Peter said, still not believing what he was hearing. 

“Do I have an echo or something?” Tony joked, throwing down the dirty rag he was fiddling with and heading towards the door of the lab. “I’ve gotta get something from upstairs can you just keep yourself busy for a minute? You can have a go at some of your old stuff if you want?” 

“Um, yeah, yeah I’ll be fine.” Peter said a beat too late, Tony already walking out of the door. Peter began to rummage through the many files on the Stark computer, surprised he could remember how to work the difficult holograms. He flicked through the various files for about 5 minutes, until he stopped at one which caught his eye. The photo was a picture of him, but not the him Peter knew now, so it must have been taken sometime in the last two years, and the file was named “to watch when sad.” Peter opened it, knowing that he shouldn’t be going through Mr. Stark’s personal files, but the temptation to watch the video, and gain another clue as to who he was was too strong. The first couple of clips were just of him and Tony messing about in the lab, getting into water fights with dumee, laughing over some science joke, and a couple of them just sitting and working in silence, enjoying each other’s company. Peter sat back in his chair, running a hand through his hair and down his face until a new video came on the screen. It was him, in a car, with the man from outside. He was narrating, talking to the camera about his adventure. Again Peter felt the pull of a fuzzy memory slowly becoming more clear, almost pixel by pixel, but he ignored the effort of trying to retrieve it, instead focusing on the images before him. Suddenly he wasn’t in the hotel room with the man from outside, he was in an airport, and dressed as Spiderman. Peter didn’t even notice himself inching closer and closer to the hologram until he nearly put his nose right through it, ruining the pictures in front of him. He quickly sat back and continued to watch himself fight a giant dude, and rave about stealing Captain America’s shield. He didn’t want to brag, but even Peter though that he was pretty badass as Spiderman. As the video stopped and another started, Peter said back in his chair and closed his eyes, finally searching for the memory which was fighting so hard to become clear, until someone cleared their throat, pulling Peter out of his head. 

“You okay there Pete?” Tony asked, leaning against the doorway with a bag of new parts for the Iron Man suit and a tub of Ben and Jerrys. 

“Can I put it on?” Peter asked, his innocent eyes boring a hole into Tony’s soul. 

“The Ice Cream? I hate to tell you Pete but I don’t think it will fit you.” Tony joked again, delighting in the small chuckle which left the boy’s mouth before he could stop it.  
“No! I meant the Spiderman suit. Can I try it on?” 

“Well it’s yours Pete, you don’t have to ask me.” Tony said, his face breaking into one of the biggest grins he has ever pulled. 

~~~~~~

“Okay Pete you’ve gotta be careful okay!” Tony shouted from his suit, hovering slightly above the ground. 

“Yeah yeah I’ll be fine!” Peter said, voice muffled by the mask. He looked down at his hand, which were covering in the red and blue material, and slowly lifted his arms to start to shoot a web. But before he shot one, he stopped himself, looking up at the Iron Man suit. “Hey Mr. Stark, um, where is Karen?” He asked timidly. 

“What? You remember her?” Tony asked, keeping the amazement out of his voice. 

“Um, yeah.” Peter said, suddenly unsure of himself. “She was cool.”

“Okay FRIDAY, activate Karen in Peter’s suit.” Tony asked, waiting to hear if the AI would appear again in Peter’s suit. 

“Hello Peter, I’ve missed you. How are you? I hope MJ and May are doing well.” The AI’s familiar voice rung out through the suit, bringing tears to Peter’s eyes as he smiled wide.  
“KAREN! I’M BACK!” Peter said, pure joy filling his voice. “Okay… I’m ready now.” Peter said as he readied himself to begin shooting a web. The surprise Tony felt when he saw Peter swinging again like he had never forgotten how to, was only surpassed by the surprise Peter felt, as he soared through the air. It was like his brain went onto auto-pilot, and even he didn’t know how he could remember to swing so easily through the air, slicing the empty space before him. Muscle memory truly is a remarkable thing. When Peter finally stopped swinging, it took all of his resolve to not fall into the arms of Mr. Stark, who had left his suit still hovering and was now making his way towards Peter with his arms wide open. The two hugged, and it was almost like nothing had changed. 

“Mr Stark can I go out in the suit?” Peter asked, his eyes wide in wonder after pulling off his mask. Tony had chosen not to use the Iron Spider suit to break Peter back into the superhero life, instead opting for the suit he had originally given him. The trauma and memories attached to the Iron suit were just too much for Tony to relive. 

“I don’t know kid…” Tony started, but soon trailed off as he saw the puppy dog eyes which Peter was currently using on him. “Fine.” He said reluctantly. “But I want you back in an hour, and you’d better not get hurt or Aunt Hottie will kill me.” 

“Ewwwww” Peter said, scrunching up his nose, and Tony couldn’t help but notice how utterly adorable he looked. 

“And don’t go too far away!” Tony shouted after Peter as he began to swing away, chuckling when he heard the kid’s shouts of joy and glee.

About half an hour after Peter began swinging, he was certain there was something not right. It was like there was something in his head which was telling him that something was wrong, but he just didn’t know what that wrong thing was. Suddenly, he was knocked out of the sky by something which he couldn’t see properly, landing hard on his back, forcing all the air out of his lungs. 

“Well hey there Peter Parker. You thought I’d gone for good?” A deep voice sounded. Peter looked up, eyes widening in fear as he looked at the figure above him. Large metal wings were attached to what looked like a man, but the man had glowing green eyes, a mask and a bomber jacket. Peter was frozen, partly to do with the shock, but also the fact that he still couldn’t breathe right. He let out a few coughs, before looking back up at the man like Bird of Prey above him. 

“How do you know my name? Do I know you? I think you’ve got the wrong person!” He asked, trying but failing to keep the fear out of his voice. 

The villain above just laughed. “Yeah Peter. You know me, I know you. You’re in big trouble now kid.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE comment if you liked/ didn't like this chapter. Honestly hearing what you guys say is the most comforting and inspiring thing for me and it just motivates me to keep going. If you have any idea of where you want the story to go/ have any ideas for any chapters then please don't be afraid to comment them. I get writers block and truth be told I have no idea where this story is going so any help would be appreciated!


	8. Drowning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY THIS IS A WEEK LATE! School is honestly so crazy at the moment and I've been really stressed, and this chapter wasn't in a place that I was happy with, but it is now! 
> 
> I am actually proud of this chapter!

The bird like man came swooping back towards Peter once again, only missing due to the fact Peter had accidently fallen off the roof of the building he was lying on in an attempt to dodge the attack. This did nothing to sway the villain however, instead changing tactic and flying down to grab Peter as he shot towards the ground, the sheer panic and the amnesia making him forget about his web shooters. The villain grabbed one of his legs, a mighty task since they were both almost a blur as Peter’s limbs flayed about him. 

“I don’t know who you are!” Peter shouted as the man started to fly away, still holding Peter’s leg rather painfully. “I really think you have the wrong person!” He shouted again, trying desperately to reason with the strange man. For some reason, again, it felt familiar, almost as it if had happened before, but again the memory was too blurry and fuzzy for Peter to even be sure it was a memory, and not his muddled brain simply trying to make sense of what was happening. The being above stayed silent despite Peter’s attempts of release, and this scared Peter even more. 

“Peter, would you like me to alert Mr Stark?” Karen’s voice whispered softly through his suit. 

“Please!” Peter pleaded, as his vision started to fade away due to the fact that they had been flying for over 5 minutes, and Peter had been upside down for almost the entire time. 

“Boss is on his way…” Peter swore he heard Karen say, before his world faded into black. 

~~~~

“I was wondering when you were gonna wake up.” A voice said, the words sounding muddled in Peter’s ears. He blinked his eyes open, squinting slightly at the bright lights and the strange ringing sound in his head. 

“Where, where am I?” He asked timidly as he tried to shake the cotton wool feeling out of his head. 

“Nowhere. Well, nowhere important.” The voice came again. Peter looked up in the direction of the strange man who was approaching him with an evil glint in his eye. 

“Please, p-please just let me go…” Peter practically whimpered, releasing almost immediately that he was no longer wearing his mask, meaning all communication with Karen was impossible. 

“And why would I do that Pete?” The man asked, almost like a dad would ask a child. The calmness the man portrayed scared Peter, but not nearly as much as the knife he was holding did. He flashed it once in the thin stream of sunlight which cut across the room, admiring how it reflected the light and shined. 

“Please, I don’t know who you are, you have the wrong person!” Peter again pleaded, knowing that it was probably useless. The man seemed to be set on killing him, whether he was the person he was looking for or not. 

“Stop playing dumb Peter. You know why I’m here.” The man said calmly, flashing Peter a murderous look when the made to interrupt. “You may have beaten me the first time, but I promise you, it won’t be happening again. You were hard to find, I have to admit. Daddy Stark likes to keep you close. I’m not surprised – I heard you got dusted along with some of the over Avengers. Stark worked so hard to get you back, I’m surprised he even let you out of his sight to go off Spidermanning!” 

Peter thought back to Karen’s soft voice, asking if she should call Mr.Stark, and the thought relaxed him, though not as much as he would have liked. “It’s okay.” He thought to himself. “Dad’s coming.” He stopped his thoughts in their tracks – had he really just called Mr. Stark Dad? Maybe he was more crazy than he thought. His internal monologue was cut off however by the sound of the strange man continuing his outer monologue. 

“I was in there as well you know. That orange place, the hell. But hey, I should be grateful I guess – Once Stark found a way to reverse it, I got back, but I wasn’t reset where I dusted. Oh no… you wanna know where I got put back?” The man looked at Peter, almost expecting an answer. Getting none, he moved on with his story. “I got reset just outside the prison walls, and everyone was so confused and glad they were back they didn’t even notice this old man skipping off into the sunset.”

Peter chuckled at the strange analogy, abruptly stopping when he caught the annoyed glare of the man in front of him, and also when he realised that he was tied to a pole, which he was currently leaning on to keep him supported. 

“Anyway. You wanna know what I found when I got home huh? I found my poor wife and my daughter, distraught because they had to change their life. All because of you Peter. All because you decided you didn’t like what I was doing. You ruined their lives, and so I’m gonna ruin yours. I’m not gonna kill you Pete, but by fuck are you gonna wish I did.” The man said, cradling Peter’s head in his hand as he flashed the knife in front of him. Peter’s eyes dropped to the ground, wishing away the tears which had begun to form. He really should have stayed at home today, safe on his sofa. 

Peter seemed to hear it before the man did, looking up to the sky as the unmistakable sound of the Iron Man suit grew closer and closer. “Shit…” The man said, eyes still focused on the sky. “Well, looks like Daddy’s here for you, maybe you forgot your lunch.” The man tease as he hurried to get his flight suit back on, visibly scared of what would happen if Iron Man found him again. After what seemed like an eternity, he stalked back towards the slumped figure of Peter, grabbing his hair roughly and yanking his hair up so he was forced to look into his eyes. “Your head already seems like it’s pretty mushed, I guess Daddy won’t mind me making it worse.” He said maliciously, grabbing the knife and swiftly bringing the butt of it down on the top of Peter’s head, splitting the skin and rendering Peter unconscious again. 

~~~~

 

What was happening? It was like Peter was in a whirlpool of memories, slowly sinking as each one came back to him. 

 

Flashes of him and MJ, kissing and watching a film.   
Flashes of Tony and Dumee in the lab, Tony smiling wide as Peter showed him his latest invention.   
Flashes of him and May, and surprisingly that Happy guy as well, all eating together on the sofa.   
Flashes of Bucky, cradling his tiny body as he cried in the Orange Hell. 

 

Peter stopped struggling, choosing instead to sink into the memories. The memories of the last two years he thought he had lost. 

 

Pain, as the spider venom travelled up his veins and towards his beating heart, changing his DNA.   
Pain, as he felt the weight of an entire building pushing down on his chest, making it hard to breathe.   
Pain, as he was torn apart in front of Tony. “I don’t wanna go…” He heard himself say.   
Pain, as he lost consciousness on the outside of a spaceship. 

 

They came flooding back, like the tide, swirling and crashing over him as he lay in the dark. 

 

Laughter, as Ned raved on about the new Stark Tower Lego Tony had given him.   
Laughter, as Peter stuck another magnet to Bucky’s metal arm.   
Laughter, as Tony tests a new suit, and gets hit in the face by a rogue part.   
Laughter, as Pepper subconsciously licks her finger and wipes a smudge of dirt from his face. 

~~~~~~

“Kid, kid you okay?” Tony said, brushing the bloody hair out of Peter’s face, cradling his head in his suit covered head as he tried to keep his fear in check. Peter began to stir, lifting his arms, glad to be free of the ropes which had been holding him down. 

“Mrstark?” Peter mumbled, blinking his eyes open, throwing himself into the superhero’s arms. 

“Hey, hey! Kid, what’s up? Are you okay?” Tony said in a concerned tone. 

“Mr. Stark, I remembered! I remembered it all!” Peter said, his voice muffled by his sobs. “He hit me, and I remembered!” Tony heard the boy’s tears splash against the metal of the suit. He disengaged it, instead leaving it on standby in case Toomes came back, and pulled the boy closer to him, feeling his t-shirt grow damp with his tears. 

Trying to hold back the water in his own eyes, Tony managed to stutter out “That’s great Pete. God I’m so proud of you...” 

“Dad… I love you.” 

“I love you too Pete. God I love you so much. I’ve missed you kiddo.”

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope that you guys like this ending! I read somewhere that this could happen, but it's not 100% - I hope you guys don't think this was just a cop out. I had initially wanted to kill Peter off in this chapter! 
> 
> I just wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone to took the time to read my little story, and all those who commented or left Kudos. It means so much to me, and to think you guys gave up time to read this makes me feel so special. So... Once again, thank you so so so so so so so so so so so much and I hope you all have the best, most perfect lives because I love you all. 
> 
> Also BTW I may be writing another fanfic which is a reader-insert Kingsam/Avengers cross-over, so keep your eyes peeled for that! 
> 
> I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of my new story! If you did please leave kudos and a comment. Also, if you guys would like to see a new story from me which is not a fanfiction, but an original bit of writing I'm working on, please tell me and then I'll decide whether to post it up on here. Stay tuned for the next chapter and thanks for giving my little project a read!


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